Film Reviews


By • Mar 18th, 2005 •

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DreamWorks Pictures presents a Parkes/MacDonald production
MPAA rating: PG-13 / Running time — 109 minutes

QUOTE: The kid is a high-functioning autistic and the mother is terrified of him. It’s not a horror/thriller, just a tedious bore.

THE RING was clever and nasty. After all, the audience was held captive and made to watch the videotape! There was no place to go with the sequel and it does not take long for you to figure out that this is the creepiest mother-son relationship on film. Eventually, there will be incest if we see any more sequels. After all, the kid is twelve, growing fast, and likes to call his mother by her first name. At least in THE RING, the mother, Rachel Keller (Naomi Watts) had a sexy former boyfriend. Here, though there is an innocent co-worker, Max Rourke (Simon Baker), who gets quickly caught up in their private drama, he is not Rachel’s love interest. Max is just a helpful shlub who pays dearly. And his rural cottage house gets trashed! La Di Da, Rachel doesn’t care. She makes peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. And wait until you see how Rachel chooses to solve the Samara problem.

First CONSTANTINE, now THE RING TWO. I see a trend with water.

Rachel, having saved her son Aidan (David Dorfman) from the 7-day curse by making a copy of the video, moves from Seattle to the sleepy, little town of Astoria, Oregon. In order to start a new life, she takes a job at the local newspaper. No sooner are the boxes unpacked than a teenager dies a horrible death. Rachel investigates and, since she works for a newspaper, is allowed access to corpses, police station interrogation rooms, and private adoption records. (And I thought my Press Credential card was merely a goodwill gesture from Films In Review! I’m going to start flaunting it.) Samara (Kelly Stables) is still out there on videotape taking lives but now it seems she wants to replace Aidan. She needs a mommy.

What in the world happened to Sissy Spacek’s nose? Did she go to Mexico for cheap plastic surgery?

Aidan is a high-functioning autistic and Rachel is terrified of him. Their relationship is so weird not even the tape could be scarier. Their entire relationship consists of two sentences they repeat over and over to each other. Instead of clinging possessively to Rachel, Aidan is like the creepy “Fats the Dummy” from MAGIC (1978, starring Anthony Hopkins). THE RING TWO is not a horror/thriller, just a tedious bore. However, it is what we have come to expect from phenomenally successful films: the lousy sequel without the original cleverness. SAW 2 is now doomed for me.

Rachel: Naomi Watts
Mark Rourke: Simon Baker
Aidan: David Dorfman
Dr. Temple: Elizabeth Perkins
Martin: Gary Cole
Evelyn: Sissy Spacek
Jake: Ryan Merriman
Emily: Emily VanCamp
Evil Samara: Kelly Stables

Director: Hideo Nakata
Screenwriter: Ehren Kruger
Based on the novel by: Koji Suzuki
Based on the film by: The Ring/The Spiral Production Group
Producers: Walter F. Parkes, Laurie MacDonald
Executive producers: Mike Macari, Roy Lee, Neil Machlis, Michele Weisler
Director of photography: Gabriel Beristain
Production designer: Jim Bissell
Music: Hans Zimmer, Henning Lohner, Martin Tillman
Costume designer: Wendy Chuck
Editor: Michael N. Knue

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